Friday Funny

A now for something a little funny - well it tickled my fancy anyway ..

Up Shit Creek . . . . ?

This rate of interest's not been seen since 1955 according to the news. Anyone with a mortgage will be pleased - unless they have recently signed up to a fixed rate deal. I'm pleased that most of my money is tied up in fixed rate deals for savers. Providing the insitutions I've chosen remain 'safe'.

I'm just wondering why the words 'headless and chickens' keep popping into mind when I think of Gordon, Darling and Mervyn. Not to mention the toothless FSA and the FSCS. Where will it all end??

Going Down the Swanee . . .

Well I've never known the BofE be so decisive before. Darling/Gordon must have leant heavily on dear Mervyn for this decision. MyMan and I had bets on what the new interest rate would be. He thought the cautious Bank of England could opt for 'half way house' and fix on 0.75% rate reduction. I said that as the news seems so bad perhaps they'd go for 2% - I was very nearly right. I wished I'd placed a bet on it.

Gloucester

During my trip I made time to call in to see Gloucester Cathedral. I had planned on my retirement to visit all the English cathedral towns. Over the years I have seen many cathedrals but by no means all of them. I should do a count one day and see how many notches I'm missing from my bed post ...

Gloucester Cathedral remains my favourite. That may be because I came to know it so well. It is very close to Shire Hall and a short walk from the shopping centre. I was often passing it so it was quick and easy to while away a half hour to inspect an odd corner. Or to light a candle and spend a moment in quiet reflection.

A Trip Down Memory Lane . . .

I took a short trip down Memory Lane a few weeks ago. A weekend away on a return to Gloucestershire for a Social Services reunion.

I took some time out to explore the area where we lived for 25 years. Not much had changed. The countryside around the 5 valleys is still very beautiful. With large expanses of sky. Steep hills. Narrow lanes. Deep valleys. Acres of common land.

Very few speed cameras. Very few signs warning 'Beware Bend'. If you do see such a sign in Glos County then you know you need to slow down - it's just as likely to be a sharp right/left hand turn rather than a slow gentle curve in the road. It seems to me that Highways in Glos County expect drivers to take care and use their own discretion rather than exhorting them to do this/that every few yards. Driving became a pleasure again with less of the distracting driver commands so often seen in Devon.

The standard of driving in Gloucestershire is still very high. With so many extremely narrow and awkward roads to traverse drivers have to constantly think ahead. And remain aware that cattle or horses can roam many of the highways.

It was also very apparant how very friendly and helpful the local people are. The number of people who wandered over to offer help if we appeared to be looking for something. As I paused to compare the present day scene with my memory I was often asked if I was looking for somewhere. Unlike in east Devon where the locals do nothing but grumble about the number of 'grockles' .

Lies, Statistics and Vital Statistics

Lies, Damned Lies and Vital Statistics ....
I've not had chance to do much blogging lately. I have been busy. Some busy in a good [enjoyable constructive way] way and some not so good [which I wont go into here].

But the one thing I've not been able to avoid is the statistic report sent in by email from SiteMeter each week. I'm surprised how many people still call in. If you are one of my regular visitors then thank you for not giving up on me. I appreciate it.

I'm amused that I pick up a great many first time visitors from search engines. A few of them pause long enough to read something. Some are out of here in a nano second. It amuses me even more when people fall in here via a spelling error or homophone. I'm beginning to think I should use a great deal more homophones in post titles.

Briefs Encounter

Just as in the ending to the film Brief Encounter I am back ..... I hope you'll be pleased that I'm here again ...

"Blog reader: Is there anything I can do to help?

Penny: Yes, blog reader. You always help.

Blog reader: You've been a long way away.

Penny: Yes.

Blog reader: Well, whatever it was, thank you for coming back to me."

If you would like some music to accompany this emotive return to Blog land . . . .

Fools Gold

I bet Gordon Brown wished he still had our gold reserves to sell on today's markets .. . .
And why are all the local councils complaining about losing money in Icelandic banks? They seem very surprised. Why?

I took my money back several months ago at the first whisper of a downgrade in the stability of the Icelandic banks. I know we are unable to 'trust' any financial institution in todays market but at least I've kept my money in the UK and just hope the Govt will continue to safeguard my precious savings.

http://www.fscs.org.uk/
http://www.fsa.gov.uk/
http://www.moneymadeclear.fsa.gov.uk/

I'm Here . . .

Sorry to leave you hanging in suspense Stinking Billy - I've just been so very busy lately .... You're correct I am no longer in that hotel in Worthing .. "Why don't you pop over and see me ...."

In these uncertain financial times a gal has to keep her money somewhere ..

Here and There

I am currently sitting in a Worthing hotel on the south coast. I've spent a week with my sister, seen nephews and niece and am about to visit an elderly aunt before I make the return trip home tomorrow. Last week with family was fun and gossipy but exhausting. I left the Croydon area at 10 yesterday morning and drove along with thousands of bikers down the A23/M23 towards Brighton. Apart from the sheer numbers of Bikers involved they all rode in a very considerate manner to other road users. I didn't realise how many differnt types and personal decorations one is able to get in the motor cycle world. Our builder who lives in Sidmouth is a biker. I kept expecting to meet him there. I didn't realise just how big an event it was until I checked the web. http://www.ace-cafe-london.com/Continental-Run-Info.aspx

http://www.ace-cafe-london.com/Reunion.aspx

I then enjoyed a quiet night in the hotel watching tv, reading and checking emails. I slept like a log for over 8 hours.

Red Van Menace

I know that if I had one of these Red Vans parked near my house I would organise a rota of residents to go out at night to paint over all the advertising. Or more subtlety still alter the mobile phone numbers so that his 'business' soon went bust. Maybe for good measure I'd smash the windows and remove the tax disc. At that point the local council may stir themselves and remove it.

Good Reasons to Have Children

As I get older I often wish we had children. Grown adult children. Strapping boys able to help their old folk out with the tasks that are now too heavy for old muscles. I said this to my sister when she told me her youngest was cutting the grass. While she cleaned the back of the fridge that he'd just hauled out of it's slot in the kitchen. She told me it's "cheaper to hire in 2 young Polish men" when needed. I'm sure that if I'd had sons I would have loved them - regardless of the expense.

Knowing my luck we would probably have bred girls.

Updated:

Which wouldn't have necessarily been a bad thing.

London Olympics 2012

Now the Olympic focus has turned to London 2012. Everyone is wondering how we can 'top' the Beijing Olympics. I hope we don't even try. I hope as the Mayor of London suggested the British will provide a different and quirky element to the 2012 Olympic opening and closing ceremonies.

I believe that we should look back to the previous London Olympics of 1948. Austerity and thrift were still in place. Rationing was tighter than during the recently ended World War 2. I think London should put in place a Thrifty Austerity Olympics where the focus is on the taking part rather than razz ma tazz. If you think this is a good perhaps you will contact Bo Jo the Mayor of London and pass on ideas.

While I am - on the subject of the London Olympics 2012 I read today on Retired and Crazy's blog the petition for the Red Arrows to be part of the opening ceremony closes in mid September. There is still time to add your signature. I did highlight the petition in a post in April. I agree with retiredandcrazy, we should pass this on to as many people as possible. We should be proud of our British heritage and should be able to highlight the few things for which we are renowned world wide.

Where the Bee Sucks ....

I am a dreadful gardener in that every plant that seeds itself has to have the opportunity to develop where it first put down roots. it leads to a haphazard planting scheme and occasional happy accidents. When I first saw this Hebe several years ago growing out of a fissure in some cracked paving I didn't expect it to live for long. I was wrong. Last year it flowered for the first time. I was pleased to find it is a totally different colour from any other of the large Hebes in my garden I wonder how far it's seed has travelled before it found a welcome niche here. This year it is putting on quite a display and on closer examination I found it a veritable hive of bee activity.

To Share in Love

Hadriana recently asked me to accept and pass on this award.

The award originated on "memoirs of a mummy blog" and she explained that the rules are to

" SHARE THE LOVE!!! Share this award with all those blogs out there that you love. All the people who make you smile. All those that make you laugh. All those that make your day. All those that leave uplifting comments on your blog." As you'll see if you click on the link there is a serious purpose on her wish for this award to be passed around.

I'm hoping that any one who calls in here during the next few days will take it up and pass it on.

Brophy's Coffee Shop Sidmouth

It's surprised me just how many hits my blog entries on Brophy's coffee shop have generated. They brought a wide range of readers to peer at this blog and some then leave a comment. Having written a few times about what used to be my favourite meeting and eating place when in Sidmouth I couldn't see why so many people ended up Googling 'Brophy's' and then falling onto my pages. I googled Brophy's myself and then found that these blog entries came out quite high along with Brophy's of Soton. So now I know. Well, I think I do. I assume they are in fact trying to find out more information about this Brophy's.

But just in case there are a few folk out there trying to find out whether or not Brophy's in Sidmouth is worth a try - then may I point you in another direction, in a friendly manner towards:

1. The Chattery - (I love the name) I've yet to try it as it has been crowded when I've tried to get in. I have heard very good reports from many people. Informal, relaxed, good coffee, good food.
2. Fields Coffee Shop: all round good value for money, excellent friendly service. If you ask for a glass of tap water they ask if you'd like ice and a slice in it ...
3. Baraza: excellent coffee (not quite up to Gary's standards but well that was perfection...a once in a lifetime experience ... sigh)
4. Clock Tower in Connaught Gardens - wonderful cakes, good coffee splendid views in fine weather

As you will see from this link of businesses in Sidmouth there are many eating places, from formal restaurants, to pubs, to coffee shops. I have enjoyed a snack and a place to rest weary limbs in many of these places. Most are very friendly. Brophy's appears conspicuous by its absence from this site. I wouldn't say that is a great loss.. .. the best I can say about it is - the seats are comfortable, it is spacious, it is not very crowded and the waitresses, Angela in particular, are friendly..

When the Cat's Away ....

When the Cat's Away the mice play they say ... Well, I've just enjoyed a very rare hour alone while MyMan has been out for a treatment. I wanted to sit and just enjoy the solitude with perhaps a good book. But then realised it was too good an opportunity to go through the kitchen store cupboards and clear out all the old stock of unopened jars and packets which had long gone by their 'use by dates'.

I even managed to find something which I think used to be a pinkish Thousand Island dressing with a 'best before 08/2000' date. As it had turned blue I binned it.

Home is Where the Cat is ...

Penny Pincher

After a tightfisted 8 years living off our retirement capital I've become rather used to Penny Pinching. Perhaps I should change my blogging name to Penny Pincher. I could re invent myself. That's the beauty of the blogging life. But however much one tries to write as if this is a fictional account real life creeps in. It's hard to keep it out.

Over the last few months I've become much better off. It started last year with being granted, on compassionate grounds, my work pension several years early. I wasn't due to receive it till I was 65. Once my pension came in I was able to cash in my AVC pension. Finally I've been awarded a Carer's Allowance. With several months arrears. Such riches.

Just at the time the whole world appears to be going into financial meltdown I appear to be bucking the trend. Hooray.

Weighed Down

I feel weighed down and hardly have the energy to think of weight issues. I can see that some, well most, of my diet problems are caused by emotional eating. Stress, anger, frustration and sorrow all make me eat more than I need. I can see that I need to express or resolve these feelings.To find some way where food is not used as a comfort factor.

As it is I'd welcome a large glass of red wine this evening. I am upset and angry. I'm sure a glass would soothe me. But it would make me hungry and then I'd eat more. Life sucks.

Peace and Calm

No - this is definitely not a view of my garden. How I wish! These photos were taken of the garden at Burrow Farm, Dalwood, near Axminster in Devon.

It's all in the Mind

I've been listening to Paul McKenna now for several days. The only problem is I fall asleep very quickly. I don't know if the 'mind programming' is working or not... I haven't heard any of them all the way through yet... I've copied the CDs onto an MP3 player. Now I can listen to the recordings lolling in the armchair after lunch - I still fall asleep though... I also have the P McKenna personal progress journal that I am religiously completing each day ... weigh day will be the 17th . . . fingers crossed.

A Stab in the Back

I see in yesterday's Daily Telegraph that Andrew Pierce wrote "Cabinet ministers are being subjected to so much abuse in the street ....." that they have talked informally about extending security cover to all ministers. They are afraid to go out in public, where they may have to cope with "an abusive drunk " or "slow hand clapping", without personal body guards. Well, we thought that a few weeks ago when we saw Harriet Harmless venturing out on to the streets of Peckham wearing a protective vest and surrounded by police protection officers.
How do they think the rest of us feel ?? It's a fine mess they have got us into and their solution is that we can pay more in taxes towards their personal safety! It rather reminds me of Tony Blair telling us that we will 'not let terroists change the way we live' as he built a concrete crash barrier around the Houses of Parliament and ordered himself a bullet and bomb proof car.

Return Journey

I am making a return journey. A return back to the woman I used to be. I used to be confident, positive, happy, relaxed, neatly dressed with well manicured hands and make up. And slimmer. Much slimmer.

I've always liked to wear my clothes on the loose side so as the excess weight crept on I just filled out my clothes more. I hadn't noticed just how much until Christmas when I couldn't squeeze into my festive outfits. That made me pause for thought and weigh myself. What a shock. I started to re think and go back to healthier habits. I started to lose weight. But then life events got the better [or the worse] of me. Again to have to think about food and preparation became the last thing on my mind. I just piled on the pounds I'd managed to shed.

Then a few weeks ago I decided that although my husband has health issues I really did need to sort myself out. I've decided to work on one thing at a time. To change one habit at a time. to re-introduce myself to me. To find out who I am again rather than being 'just' a wife and carer.

I decided to let many of the household chores go. To save time for myself to enjoy life. First was to start to learn to play Bridge. Second was to grow my nails, to manicure my ragged cuticles and start to wear nail polish. Now I am working on my weight problem. However, this time I am not on a diet. I already eat a healthy diet. But I think that with the stress and depression I have been eating without thinking. I have been eating too large portions. I am trying to see whether Paul McKenna can do as he says. I have bought the book and studied the rules. I will try my best. I will let you know how it goes.

Sod's Laws

It's Sod's Law that :
[1] the young don't want to stop for sleep, feel full of energy, but sleep as if poleaxed for 12 +hours
[2] the oldies want to sleep, feel perpetually tired but feel grateful if they manage more than 4 hours deep sleep
[3] it rains when you've just watered the garden and all the containers
[4] it fails to rain for weeks if you've just sprinkled powdered weed n feed on the lawn
[5]the house gleams, smells of polish, is tidy but no one calls
[6] the house looks like Steptoes' junk yard with thick dust every where and unexpected visitors drop in for a 'surprise' visit.

That's life I suppose ....

Bridge Too Far

Bridge lessons have been suspended until mid September. I am relieved. It will give me chance to catch up in the garden. And give me some time to blog again. I love bridge. After a 10 week course I am only half way through knowing all I need to know to start playing. I just have to keep reading and studying my notes to ensure I don't forget all we have been taught so far.

Garden and Favourite Plants

I love our garden.


On our move here from Gloucestershire we thought this was a level playing field. That garden was so steep I was unable to mow the lawn. It was a man's job. A hover mower was used to cut the grass up hill as far as could be reached. On up to a grassy terraced path and to lower the mower on a rope to cut the rest of the steeply inclined lawn. Children used to love that lawn. It was perfect for playing roly poly. But as we got older we could see it would eventually prove troublesome.

This garden by comparison was perfect. Although it is uphill it is more gentle. But being on top of the hill it is windy. So every plant has to be hardy, impervious to winds, frost and to earn its keep. Anything finicky, or especially delectable to slugs,that I find irresistible are kept in pots. The only trouble is the pots are growing in number.

Now Swiftly Moving On . .

When I started this Blog I was very unhappy. Looking back I can see I was more depressed than I realised. Suffering from unresolved grief through many bereavements over a 3-year period. The loss of my 2 very old cats compounded that feeling of bereavement so severe I lost sight of myself for a while. It was only my recent attendance at two funerals that made me realise that I no longer feel emotionally overwhelmed. I still feel sad but it is no longer an all enveloping sadness.

I've been reading 'The Book of Happiness' . It is helping me to focus. It defined the difference in the feelings of sadness and unhappiness. "Sadness is a part of life and we experience it as a result of life's events . . ."! Well I have had plenty of those of the last few years. Ithas been energy sapping. Now I am trying to come to terms with those events and 'move on'.

To move on I need to make several changes. We moved into our present house [1999] from a larger 4 bedroom house. As it was a sudden move we didn't have time to de-clutter. We just packed up and moved with more stuff than we needed. We were going to expand into the roof here with a loft conversion. It was going to be my husband's home office. Suddenly our circumstances changed and he no longer needed a home office. We never did the loft conversion. Meanwhile the spare bedroom and garage held all his office papers, tax and VAT files, etc .

To move on we need to de-clutter. We have sold all the office furniture. My husband is slowly trawling through paperwork, archiving financial information and shredding personal client papers. It's a slow process. We also need to make a decision on life changes about where we will live out our retirement years. Home is very important to me. I need to feel settled, rooted, in order to regain my equilibrium. I love it here and so it adds to my feelings of sadness on thinking of leaving. But it is not suitable for our situation now. My husband now has a strong desire to move elsewhere. We just don't know where yet. It needs to be somewhere less hilly.

We are also trying to sort out a new car. Just normal activities but very time consuming and demanding. Especially when trying to make decisions with someone who doesn't feel at all able or capable of making decisions. I'm pressing on as I don't feel we can waste time. I've reached the age where time seems to gallop by at an alarming pace.

I've missed posting a regular blog. . . .. this is just a short note to let you know why I haven't had time to call by to meet up with you and chat at yours on a regular basis.

Going Metric

Let's go metric. Completely metric. I need a 10 day week; 30 hour days. That way I may get to the end of the week and have managed some of the tasks on my ever expanding and demanding 'To Do List' .

A Right Royal Garden Party

I was looking forward to attending a party this week. Until the weather changed for the better. I'd been looking forward to an indoor party. But with the change in the weather it changed to a garden party. Except that it was so hot and sunny most wanted to remain indoors in the shade.

Shade there was a plenty but it was hotter in than out. The huge conservatory heated the already scorching air and shepherded it in thorugh the french doors into the lounge. It was like sitting next to a huge glass Aga. The wine didn't help. It just enhanced the rosey glow on everyone's cheeks. The ice melted before it had chance to chill the drinks clasped in our hot little hands. Sandwiches and cakes began to wilt.

A few of the hardier guests [who took holidays in exotic locations] with skin like crisp brown leather, sat outdoors on the sunbaked south facing patio under the scant protection of one sun shade.

Late in the afternoon as the sun slowly sank those of us timid pale skinned folk who had already survived skin cancer or malignant melanoma ventured out to partake of the slightly cooler air. A lovely fresh 80+* F rather than 100+*F indoors. The house bricks emitting all the days stored radiation as if from a baker's oven.

By this time even the hardy brownites wanted to keep in the shade. We all huddled together at the end of the patio - squeezing up close in a friendly manner to share the measly amount of precious shade. Like penguins on an ever decreasing ice flow. Someone suggested the sun shade could be tilted to provide a bit more shade but as soon as it was tilted it caught the slightest breeze and swung like a gib to the east. Hauled back to the west someone kindly sat there with his arm up to hold it in place. Then with the next breeze it billowed like a spinnaker and slowly toppled dragging the patio table and wine glasses with it. Jim the host leapt to attention from his sun drowsed slumber and made an athletic lunge. Anchoring the table down before it hit the deck. So there we sat us ladies, with Jim clutching the table and Mark holding on to the sunshade.

The breeze dropped and the heat stored in the house walls began to leach into our small shady spot. We all started to glow. I suggested we all move the table, chairs and ourselves a few feet across the patio into the shade cast by the house as the sun continued on its westerly dip. Nobody picked me up on the idea. I repeated it in a louder voice. Still no response. I shut up. maybe it was too close to that giant Aga of a glasshouse.

I thought that if only I had been a traveller and visited South Africa or Ayers Rock then I wouldn't be so affected by a hot English summer evening. But no, Jim later confessed that it had been far too hot for him too and he'd lived for many years in Australia.

Northern Rose and Woes

Here is a little something to cheer you all for the next few weeks - this will have to do till the book is out.

I Could Blog About this ...

I could blog about this I think numerous times a week. I'm not short of ideas. I'm not short of daft or peculiar observations on life, the universe and everything. But I have been short of time. A friend's husband has now returned to full health and driving duties after a pacemaker was fitted. So I am now relieved of taxi duties. Unfortunately a couple of friends have died. I have attended one funeral. Another one to go on Monday. After that I hope to have finished with my share of sadness and upset for 2008. I now want to cash in my 'happiness' voucher' for a bit of daft frivolity.

Funerals aren't what they used to be. Well not in Sidford they aren't. Do all funeral directors now arrange for the coffin to be carried into church on a squeaky wheeled trellised trolley? or is it only in Sidford - where the pall bearers appear older than the recently dead incumbent of the coffin? If Health and Safety at Work rules now insist on coffins being wheeled along then couldn't the Funeral Director at least ensure the wheels are well oiled before the sombre journey is undertaken.

A trolley doesn't have quite the same emotional impact as a coffin being transported in and out of church on the shoulders of 6 burly black clad men. Replaced instead by a less dignified slow march to squeak squeak squeak.... We crowded into the church 15 minutes ahead of the service. It slowly filled with people of all ages over 70 yrs, the walking sticks and zimmer frames taking up as much room as the mourners. I feel very young amongst so many older folk.

A moment - well several moments - of quiet reflection was frequently broken by the clatter of falling walking sticks. Each clatter on the stone floor made me jump. I must be stressed and tense - I leapt out of my skin each time. A sad occasion but as I felt a giggle trying to surface I was reminded once again that Les wouldn't be there to share the funny side of his funeral service with me. He had a wicked devilish sense of humour. I'll miss him.

Meme for the Bookish

Merri tagged me the other day. I thought I might have to think up some more truthful, embarrassing or quirky facts about myself and expose them on my blog. But no - this is different, it has a form of randomness to it ... once you've selected the book.

Here are the rules:

Step 1 – take a book from the book shelf.
Step 2 – turn to page 123.
Step 3 – read and write out the 5th sentence.
Step 4 – tag 5 more people.

I have 3 bookcases. So first I had to choose which set of shelves to attack. I discarded all the encyclopedia, the books on 'How to Play Bridge' or any self improvement books such as 'How to Win Friends and Influence Money'. I was left with the choice between a book from all the books purchased but as yet unread or selecting an old favourite.

In the end I chose a very old favourite -

Lord Chesterfield's "Letters to His son and Others" a paperback version published by Dent ISBN 0 460 11823 4

"He sometimes affects hard words by way of ornament, which he always mangles,like a learned woman. A man of fashion never has recourse to proverbs and vulgar aphorisms; uses neither favourite words nor hard words; but takes great care to speak very correctly and grammatically, and to pronounce properly, ..... . "

As you can see from the excerpt which is taken from page 123 beginning with the 5th sentence [along with this page of ' quotes'] these letters were from a very different age; written by a Gentleman.

I now nominate the following to take up this meme and, if they have the time to, run with it:

1. Stinking Billy
2. Merryweather
3. Maggie May
4. Teeni
5. Canon Bass 1

If you call in and read this and want to take part please feel free to do so.

For Pianists Everywhere

I'm so impressed to learn from MerryWeather's latest blog that she plays the piano.

However much I like and admire Merryw I bet she is nowhere as cute a pianist as Nora. I just love Nora's relaxed style of playing. I admire the fact that although there are a few off -key notes she continues with unabated enthusiasm. I think the best example of her work is at the beginning of the duet with Betsy Student. A concert of her full repertoire can be viewed here on this video.

Stats

I've hardly had time to put fingertips to keyboard these last few weeks. I came on today to post a quick link to a petition and then couldn't resist popping out to see some old friends. Then just when Ii should be in the kitchen and starting to prepare an evening meal I peeked at my Stats counter. I felt awful when I saw that a few loyal blog friends had continued to pop in to see what if any news from me and there was none.

I am out - again - tomorrow but hope to catch up with blogging over the weekend. To tell you why I've been so short on time. Meanwhile please accept my apologies.

Help Save Your Local GP Surgery

Sign the BMA petition to try and save your local GP surgeries from going the same way all our local Post Offices went.

Information for the Public and Patients: http://www.supportyoursurgery.org.uk/public.php

Click on the link below to Sign the on- line petition for public and patients: http://www.politicalwizard.co.uk/administration/campaign_layout/index.php?category=petitions&uid=3396&campid=2488&detail=y&c=s