Sunday, 12 June 2011

The Wish to be Eight Again

Oh - To be eight again!
A man was sitting on the edge of the bed, watching his wife who was looking at herself in the mirror. Since her birthday was not far off he asked what she'd like to have for her birthday. 'I'd like to be eight again', she replied, still looking in the mirror.

On the morning of her Birthday, he arose early, made her a nice big bowl of Coco Pops, and then took her to the Adventure World theme park. What a day! He put her on every ride in the park; the Death Slide, the Wall of Fear, the Screaming Roller Coaster, everything . . .

Five hours later they staggered out of the theme park. Her head was reeling and her stomach felt upside down. He then took her to a McDonald's where he ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries and a chocolate shake.

Then it was off to a movie, popcorn, a soda pop, and her favorite candy, M&M's. What a fabulous adventure! Finally she staggered home with her husband and collapsed into bed exhausted.

He leaned over his wife with a big smile and lovingly asked, 'Well Dear, what was it like being eight again? Her eyes slowly opened and her expression suddenly changed.

'I meant my dress size, you retard!!!!'

The moral of the story: Even when a man is listening, he is gonna get it wrong


Around My Kitchen Table said...

And there was I thinking I'd quite like to be doing all those eight-year-old things! Even so, I'd also like to be Size 8!

ChickPea said...

Dunno if I was EVER a size 8! It sounds like a fabulous birthday - and I am sooooo impressed The man was listening!

toby said...

Hello Ladythinker, glad you're alive and well-ish! I didn't think it appropriate to leave my comment on your carer site as it's slightly spammy. Apologies.

I am sure you prefer your novels on paper but, if you are in the mood for some down-market fiction and can bear it in the form of an eBook, you can find my latest literary effort on in the Kindle section. I have even dedicated my suspense-filled, woman-in-jeopardy, crime-in-high-places saga, Dark by the River, to you and a few old blog buddies!

I know it's not your cup of tea and I suspect the prequel, Dawn by the River, is even less to your taste but they are the best I can do for now. It's not Hemingway or Stieg Larsson or Jeffrey Archer but one publisher said it is "good stuff"; before declining to offer me a contract! Another said my stories are "fluently written" but need "polishing", which suggests there is potential. Or not?!

I use the nom de plume Elli Fitz.

Best wishes.

(btw - Toby is real, Daniela is not! In case you should wonder.)