Sunday, 1 July 2007

Taking the Piss Outta Spell Checkers

If you rely two heavily on computerised spell chequers then their is every chance that yaw righting may be perfectly spelt but make know sense whatsoever. Eye am beginning to receive letters from banns that I find hard to interpret. It isn't always a case of a wrong word in the wrong contempt, it is sometimes a mistyped word where they're fingers have whipped on the keyboard. Or missed out letter, here and there.
I went into the bang the other day as they said they heeded my signature to enable me to cash the check for the £100 in £5 notes that I wanted. Banks are not two seen on hashing cheques for cash. Thy wood much rather ewe queued at the aromatic cash dispenser [or ATM] and then cued again to exchange your cash for the £5 notes. I do knot have thyme for this. So I took my piss pot into the bank as the letter requested to enable me to prove who I am. I assumed they where going to do a DNA sample as proof. I know they have too be vary careful. I no all about the laws on being carefree and a money launderer. The bank clack didn't find it amusing. I dint have the letter with me as proff. So I add to return home to collect the letter and my new passport . On my way home I dropped off the pisspot and sample at the doctor's sugary four a cheque up as I do sew hate waist.


The thinker said...

It's thanks to witty woman's posting on

which reminded me I wanted to have a goon this subject.

Witty Woman said...

Thanks for the plug! Now just add me to your blogroll (us Brits must stick together) and we're done! Ugh, I've just noticed that the link to my blog entry says "its" instead of "it's". Don't you just hate it when web addresses do that???

Glad I found your blog, I shall return and check more of it out. This entry of yours reminds me of a story I wrote for the school magazine, way back when I was in my teens. It was called Agatha Cartwheel. Don't ask me why, I had no idea then and I have no idea now.

BTW, did you really mean to say you wanted to have a "goon"?

Around My Kitchen Table said...

I wish my bonk had an aromatic cash dispenser. Unfortunately it just has a whole in the wail. I have never yet had to take my piss pot in but I've got one in the cup bored in case I ever knead it.
PS: Very funny post!
PPS: I've just realised my comment sounds exactly like that gendarme chap in Allo, Allo.

The thinker said...

witty woman - thanks - I'll be updating my blog links when I'm more techie minded - all fingers and thumbs today - watch this space. I have to admit the goon was a missed typo error but when I spotted it I decided to leave it in - as it seemed a fortuitous accidental mishappening. As I was typing the post the whole thing started to remind me of Ronnie Barker so maybe the Goons crept in to my subconscious.

AMKT - LOL - I know just what you mean! Good Moaning - thanks for dropping Bye.

rilly super said...

you are lucky to have such a pot to piss in thinker, as the bank charges leave most of us without one...

Poetess said...

Hi Thinker

Your post wars very amusing, until I realised add not picked up on some of the gaffes. Now I arm quiet cornered.


Me senses a poem comming on.!!

Poetess said...


Love the piss pot scenario. That is very fully.


The thinker said...

Lovely to see the whites of your eyes again Rilly.
Yes - I am lucky to be so blessed - am not entirely on my uppers - I count my good fortune - it just doesn't go very far down here in the south.

The thinker said...

Hi poetess - sorry you feel cornered - I'm just about to pop over to see if there is a pome now - as you felt one come on the other day.

Merri said...

Yes I can relate to the bank story, and too true at least you HAVE a for spelling, spell checking has toatlly made me a bad speller.
I know seem a bit dyllexice...(which all intelligent folk are (a little ibt)

The thinker said...

Hi Merri - not to mention having to check that I am using the English English rather than US English ! ;)